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narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: narwhal-noir
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animateglee:

Umbridge: “Boys and girls are not permitted to be within 8 inches of each other.

[gay wizard laughter]

(via geminihistorian)

Source: animateglee
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aneternalscoutandabrownie:

jamesmdavisson:

So far, I have been enjoying the Adventures of Business Cat a great deal, possibly more than is appropriate for an adult human. (All of these are from the webcomic Happy Jar)

UPDATE: Now with more Business.

YES ALL THE BUSINESS CAT STRIPS IN ONE PLACE

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: jamesmdavisson
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my-soulmate-is-dave-strider:

clapchat:

so my brother only has one eye and one time in art class the teacher said “draw your neighbors eye” so he took his fake eye out and sat it on the girls desk that was sitting next to him and she screamed and started crying

Your brother is golden

(via easyasapplepie)

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dangerhamster:

Quotes from the Harry Potter Books [22/50]

THIS BIT IN THE BOOK MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD!

"A nickname?"

"Yeah, it’s what my friends call me."

"I’m well aware of what a nickname is."

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: lufttsu
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lokeleo:

andthenewt:

weirdnessloveandscifi:

bohemian-napsody:

very fucking punny you shits

teeth

with all the actual humour, tumblr still finds “teeth” the funniest thing.

actual humor

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: bohemian-napsody
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yes-i-am-lucifer:

pmon3y69:

drdawg:

my friend Pete literally makes me cry with his snap stories

this is me, i am pete, love me 

we love you pete

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: drdawg
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filthwitch:

Jewcy couture

filthwitch:

Jewcy couture

(via mattg124)

Source:
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ten-and-donna:

masukunda:

devourthegalaxy:

sayingnotostatusquo:

alwayscastle17:

dauntless-nerdfighter:

THIS IS BRILLIANT ON SO MANY LEVELS

THIS IS BEAUTIFUL

Excuse me, I think you’re forgetting a few people

image

image

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And last but not least…

image

OH. MY. GOD.

IT GOT BETTER

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: 10doctorxrosetyler
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vycarious:

DON;T MOVE EVERYBODY ON THE GROUND IT’S THE FUCKIN FBI

(via mattg124)

Source: brutalscenequeen
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obshasatumbleriguess:

baconbroderick:

The most important .gif

If those hills were alive, they ain’t now…

obshasatumbleriguess:

baconbroderick:

The most important .gif

If those hills were alive, they ain’t now…

(via easyasapplepie)

Source: baconbroderick
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getoutoftherecat:

that’s not your chair cat!

Source: getoutoftherecat